(This is a snapshot inside my head on very scattered-minded day. This is a poorly written, quick memo from inside my head on a very ADHDish day)
Just a glimpse of my struggle today, a very ADHD day.
I woke up at 4:30AM. I was wide awake. I thought about staying up, since my alarm goes off at 6, and I always have trouble getting up and out the door. I have been late for work way too many times lately. I forced myself to go back to sleep, only to hit the snooze button multiple times when my alarm went off. I left the house thirty minutes late.
On my way to work, I had an idea for a comic book. The characters would all be parasites living on the body of dirty, smelly guy named Ernest. I created back-stories that involved the Treaty of Lice, where three factions drew boundaries establishing their respected kingdoms (Head Lice, Body Lice and Pubic Lice) I had much much more, basically an entire season worth of storylines.
Then it was work stuff, work stuff, work stuff. But while doing it I finished a poem and posted it to my blog. I also have a list of personal things that MUST be done, bills, legal notices, banking, doctors, etc. I have a list because I took time to sit down and write everything down, again…because I am pretty sure I made the same list yesterday and checked nothing off of it.
I hate talking on the phone, I have to be in the right mindset to handle personal business. I only get in that mindset at the absolute last minute then stress over getting everything done. Still I type this (which should be low on my priorities) with the list (still nothing checked off) sitting in front of me.
In my mind I’ve pondered my inattentiveness, ADHD, and the possibilities of Adult Autism. I looked at medical encyclopedia to see how all the tendons work in my middle finger, because it hurts and I still haven’t called the doctor to make an appointment.
I tried to do something on my list, update my car insurance, but I got a processing error on the website and a message popped up telling me to call customer service…so much for checking that off the list, maybe later.
I have attempted to staple a stack of papers on 3 separate occasions…each time I discover that my stapler is out of staples. I set out to reload it, then forget until I look down and think, “Oh, papers that I need to staple!” and the process repeats.
So many thoughts that I have already forgotten…or just don’t feel like typing into this. After all my finger hurts and I have a lot of things to do.